Frustration Fridays

That's what I'm calling Friday's from now on. Frustration Fridays. Frustration Friday's leave me Frazzled. I busted my ass at the gym this week. I went the full 6 days, I've been doing 60 minutes on the arc trainer, lifting weights, the whole nine yards. And I even accomplished my goal of no soda (perhaps the greatest miracle of all time). And the results of todays weigh in? 229.6. One measley pound.
I'm thinking this weeks focus has to be on eating habits. It's the only thing I haven't changed, and I left it alone for a reason. This is going to be the tough one. I like food. I eat when I'm upset. Lately, due to bff drama, I've been upset, and therefore pigging out. But I also don't think it's wise to just cut out everything unhealthy because, again, I'll be setting myself up for failure. That being said:
GOALS for week 3:
1) Continue with no soda. The temptation has gone down significantly over the past week, to the point where my cravings are incredibly bearable. Plus, I didn't lose my goal of 2 pounds. Therefore, no reward.
2) NO COOKIES. This is a problem for me. i like cookies a lot. and I work in an environment where i can have free cookies whenever I want. But maybe it'll be like the soda, and after this week I won't even want them anymore.
3) Gym 6 times a week, like usual. It's going to be more difficult, because I don't have the motivation from losing weight, but we have to do what we have to do.
If I meet these goals, hopefully I'll see some good results next friday. I think that losing weight is almost like math. Once you find the right formula, you're golden. But it's finding the right formula that's the ultimate challenge.

It's Valentine's day sunday. Last year, I had to work 3-close (which is 10 pm) because I was the only one who didn't request the night off. Read as: I was the only single person. This year, things have changed dramatically. I'm working 2-close. I've never actually been in a relationship for Valentine's day. FML. And unfortunately, it's one of those holiday's that isn't a lot of fun when you're single. Like Christmas, it sucks being single for Christmas too.

On a different note: last night I had a dream I wore a bikini. And I wasn't disgustingly fat in it. Ohhh, if only....

xoxo.

No Soda Maketh Me Drowsy

Good newssss. I haven't had soda since Thursday. Which means I've gone four days without it. I've mainly been drinking water. A glass of milk here and there. Tonight, I went for pizza with my friend and had fruit punch. She says that's just as bad as soda. I'm going to dissagree. Anyways, I've also gone to the gym every day. And I've been doing a full hour on the arc trainer, which results in burning about 850 calories. Then I like to do weights to cool down. It's a miracle I'm alive right now, I've been so busy. On the bright side, my morning class got cancelled for tomorrow, which means I might get to fit in two workouts! That is, if I decide to get my fat ass out of bed early. Not likely, but I'll try. I don't have class until 12:3o with the cancellation.
I'm feeling pretty good about myself now that I'm working out regularly. I always want to go weigh myself, but I'm making myself wait until Fridays, official weigh in days. It started out just because it was a Friday the first time I weighed myself, but it works well. Because I eat worse on the weekends, so I have more time to get back on track before the weekly moment of truth.

2 lbs down....a lot to go.

So, good news. I weighed myself today, a week after I first stepped on the scale, and I'm down to 230.8 lbs. I'm going to consider it a success since I've eaten like a pig a few days out of the week, and was unsuccessful at cutting out soda. I went to the gym Friday, Saturday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Today. And I went for about an hour and fifteen minutes each time. Had a really good workout today, there was this cute guy there on the bike next to me, then when I went to the arc trainer, he did too. If I wasn't feeling so fat today, I might have struck up a conversation. But I was feeling fat, so he had to make do with mutual awkward glances.
Goals for this week:
1)NO SODA- here's what I've decided. I'm going to cut out all soda for the next week, and see what it does. If it makes a difference, I might feel more motivated to make it a permanent thing. If I lose at least 2 pounds by next Friday, I'll let myself have one mountain dew. One. Good plan? I think so.
2) GYM 6 DAYS/WEEK- This is what I usually do. I just missed a day this week. I'm going to try to stay for an hour and a half each session. It's only adding 15 minutes to my norm, so it should be a reasonable goal.

These seem pretty good for one week, I don't want to go overboard, because it'll make me want to quit altogether. But if all goes well, next weeks goals should be more food oriented.
Yessss to weight loss!
xoxo

Mountain Dew and other things

So. The whole no soda resolution, not going so hot. I think I'm addicted to mountain dew. I'm always so tired in the mornings that after my first class I head to the vending machines to get one. I'm not much of a coffee drinker unless it's loaded with cream. Anyone know good alternatives to soda?
Anyways, I had one of the best workouts I've had in a while tonight. I missed two days in a row due to work and school, but tonight I made sure to get my ass thereee. And it turned out to be great. I started out doing the arc trainer for 45 minutes, which is a usual for me. What's not usual is for it to go by without desperately wanting to quit. It was great. New music always gets me through long, tedious workouts. Then, I did some weights for 20 minutes or so. Then I did 6 miles on the bike. Overall, I was there about an hour and a half and burned about 1,000 calories. It didn't hurt that "Robert Pattinson" was there tonight ;-) Hopefully the awesomeness of this workout will inspire me through my morning workout tomorrow. It's always difficult to get up at 8am when my first class isn't even until 11:30. But we gotta do what we gotta do.
My biggest inspiration for this is that hopefully, one day, I'll be able to go buy a bikini. I have NEVER gotten to buy one. Ever. And it would be so awesome to look decent in one. I love looking at them in stores, choosing the ones I'd buy if I had the right body. I'm hoping to kick it into high gear to be able to look decent in ANY swimsuit by summer.

Robert Pattinson goes to Planet Fitness?

Sooo, I'm exhausted. I'm still gymming it like crazyyy. I've been waking up early monday wednesday friday to make it to the gym before my first class. Then Tues, Thurs I go evenings. Saturday and Sunday I fit it wherever I can. The hardest part is always getting there. I'm pretty good about staying for at least an hour. It doesn't hurt that there's a few hotties there. There's this one guy that goes to my gym, he looks EXACTLY like Robert Pattinson. Except with cleaner hair. It's crazy. But totally a motivator to get to the gym.
Anyways, this morning I stepped on the scale for the first time in months. I figured, I need to know just how much work I need to do. And the results....232. Definitely higher than it's ever been. But then again, three weeks ago it was probably around 240...so I can't complain. I just need to use that number to get me to the gym, and to get food out of my mouth. I'm going to set my first goal at 215. Once I reach that, I'll bump it down to 200, and keep going like that. Because my ultimate goal of 130 seems very, very far away right now. I'm proud of myself though, because I've done really well going to the gym every day. Even though I HATE getting up early, I've been forcing myself to. And that says a lot.
I like going to the gym. It's interesting, because everyone at the gym wants to improve their body, or else they wouldn't be there. And it's funny to see that even "skinny" people go to the gym, running miles, unhappy about their body. I've learned a lot about sports at the gym, just because my favorite calorie burning machines (the arc trainerssss) are right below the tv playing ESPN. Ladies, it's more interesting than you'd think.
So, my next goal to try on top of the whole gym thing, is to cut out soda COMPLETELY this week. It's going to be rough. I'm used to running on caffeine (I'm a college kid, what can you expect?). No more mountain dew code red for me.
Anywaysss, time for sleep. I woke up early to go to the gym, went to classes, then went to work until 10:30 pm. Time to catch some zzz's.
xoxo

Society Sucks

Today, I was lazily facebook stalking some classmates, when I came across a friend of mine (who is a male, btw) who became a fan of a page called, "You're fat, why do you dress like you're skinny?" I was immediately offended. Being quite overweight myself, I was disgusted in the fact that someone thinks a comment like that is acceptable. As if there are certain clothes that only a "skinny" girl can wear. I was especially offended because I like to dress cute. I have never used my weight as an excuse to be unfashionable. Sure, I could never pull off a bikini, but I love to look nice: it's a total confidence booster. I may not have my weight under control, but I can put together a nice outfit.
I don't understand Society's obsession with fat people. It's like because I'm overweight, everyone thinks it's okay to judge me and label me as a "fat girl". Weight is an extremely personal issue to young women and it's not right for media to portray it as a "societal issue". The real societal issue is society's obsession with weight. No one can change my weight but me, so butt out and let me do this by myself, without your input.
Anyways, I should probably introduce myself. I'm Sara, I'm 18, and I'm fat. Always have been. The last time I weighed myself, I was about 220 lbs. This was a while ago and I'm positive I've gained weight since then, but I'm afraid to step back on the scale. About two weeks ago, I decided it was time to give this whole weight loss thing another go. I've been going to the gym at least 6 days a week for at least an hour each day. I've been trying to watch what I eat, drink more water, and take the stairs instead of the elevator. Making these changes isn't the hard part. The hard part is waiting for the results.
I decided to start this blog for a few reasons:
1)To motivate me to keep this whole healthy lifestyle thing up.
2)To reach out and inspire other young women who may be in the same position
and
3)To give everyone an inside look at the trials of weight loss.
If you have mean comments, get the (bleep) off this page. If you have positive comments or questions, then welcome and leave a message.

More posts soon to come
xoChubs